five things I do that are probably annoying to someone else

1) make things up when I don't know the answer
2) repeatedly use cornball jokes your dad would tell
3) interrupt people when they are talking to me
4) insert "that's what she said" into ironic moments in conversation. not where it is supposed to go to make sense, but purposely where it makes none
5) smile when arguing

five more (yes i'm irritable) annoying things

1) forced accents
2) breaking a chip off in the salsa
3) being corrected on grammar
4) finding out too late that your new beer is not a twist off
5) being reminded of a mistake you already beat yourself up over

five annoying things that don't have a specific name

1) someone commenting on your strategy of playing a game while you play that same game, sometimes against that person
2) the sound of drunk laughter through a wall when you have to get up early in the morning
3) thinking you have food in the refrigerator that really isn't there
4) watching t.v. and seeing the same commercial twice during a commercial break
5) having a song stuck in your head, but only part of it, and can't remember either who it's by or what it's called, and when you hum it to your friends to see if they can recognize it, they just look at you like your crazy and try to change the subject nervously, but you persist, because it's been bugging you all day, just repeating and repeating the same 4 or 5 or 10 words with that catchy melody that goes up and down and then pauses on that one note for a couple of seconds, and it reminds you of that time in high school when you were making out

five phrases I don't want to hear in the media again for a long long time

Because they make me dread something that I have no very little control over

1) "just a heartbeat away"
2) "bailout"
3) "gotcha _______"
4) "recession"
5) "hockey mom"

five more things that annoy me the most

1) silent rooms where the smack-gnash-chew of someone grinding ferociously at a piece of gum can be heard directly behind me
2) standardized tests
3) bodily functions
4) karma
5) political . debates

five things I don't realize I'm doing until it's too late

1.) feeling smug
2.) ogling
3.) insulting someone's intelligence
4.) drinking too much
5.) procrastinating

five things I don't like very much

1.) people who pretend to talk on cell phones when walking alone in public
2.) black lights
3.) t-shirts that are stretched out around the neck
4.) picky eaters
5.) dirty jokes

five more rock solid truths

1.) there are two versions of every song: the one sung, and the one spoken sarcastically, smugly, and irrelevantly in normal conversation
2.) time is the leading cause of depression
3.) a loud and friendly fart will ruin every argument immediately
4.) legal terms all sound like sophisticated sexual innuendo
5.) rocks are solid objects.

five fake a cappella group names

1.) flat trick
2.) eureka pella
3.) the clefhangers
4.) kickin bass and takin notes
5.) eight guys doing something they'll brag about for a long long ridiculously long time