five things that have happened since my last post

1) moved to chicago
2) finished my 1st semester of law school
3) reevaluated my goals, dreams, fears, and love for coffee
4) got engaged on an airplane
5) suffered approximately 3 dozen panic attacks

irritatingly punny

five businesses to start with a name and go from there

1) CupKate's: bakery for someone named kate

2) Pizza This: italian restaraunt (slogan- "you wanna pizza me" featuring a britney spears look-a-like biting into a delicious pizza) "fun for the whole dysfunctional family"

3) Guilt-Tea: tea shop and sex boutique

4) Startrucks: truck-stop coffee shop where poetic elitist truckers go to be seen and spend ridiculous amounts of time reading thick novels and updating their twitter

5) Books-a-Trillion: one-up two-up

five things I don't know the difference between

1) sneakers and tennis shoes
2) audrey hepburn and katharine hepburn
3) sugar and caffeine
4) cobalt and royal blue
5) r&b

hard to define transitions

1) the temperature between yummy coffee and dark, acidic water
2) the space between being complete strangers and being friends: "friengers"
3) age 22 to 27: an old dick to your younger friends and a young asshole to your older ones
4) the moment you realize you are wrong
5) the area between a coherent and accurate memory and a fuzzy and questionable image that could have been a dream

five acquired tastes

1.) black coffee
2.) sleepy lyrics coupled with lazy beats
3.) pleated pants
4.) cocktails made with three ingredients or less
5.) the work of Tim Burton

five euphemisms

for barf:
1.) laugh lung butter
2.) technicolor yodel
3.) call for huey
4.) burping bits
5.) go to europe with ralph and earl in a buick

for diarrhea
1.) liquidated assets
2.) brewing hot chocolate
3.) Drippidy Doo Da
4.) pour some coffee
5.) tomatoes are evil